PATIENCE – TO ACCEPT
Who knew something so simple could be so complicated and hard to apply? Patience is the first key to self-control. Learning to respond to things instead of react to them. Learning to take an extra second to think. Learning to know when to stop and wait, learning to accept the situation for what it is, then respond by deciding to do something about it.
MORE THAN JUST WAITING…
Sure, waiting shows patience, but what is patience exactly? We hear it used so many different ways, this person is wearing on my patience, or I don’t have the patience to wait.
That is because patience doesn’t mean to wait, waiting shows patience, but patience means to accept. In those cases, accepting that you have to wait.
Want to have more patience with your child? Your family?
Then you have to learn to accept, learn to accept them where they are at right now. Of course we want to teach our kids to grow and to do better. This requires us to be patient with them though, and lets face it, in relationships, or as a parent, this is tested to an unbelievable degree. If you have never been there, you just can’t know.
Once you can accept that they are where they are at, they think what they do, they did whatever they did, then you can begin to move forward with ways to compromise or correct it in the future. First you have to accept it to not push a knee jerk response of anger or frustration. This does NOT mean that you shouldn’t set a hard line, or express your disappointment.
But it does mean explain it to them, which requires patience.
That’s right, because fact of it is, you can scare a child all you want, but they won’t learn a lesson from that. It may seem so, but all it really does is cause them to shut down when it comes to that subject or topic and avoid it completely.
That doesn’t really teach them how to handle or cope with similar situations in the future, it teaches them avoidance rather than acceptance and healthy ways to deal with it.
It may be important to the situation to express your frustration or disappointment, but don’t make it ABOUT expressing those things, make it about why you feel that way. Explain to them why its not a healthy way to go about something, explain to them ways to handle it in the future if it pops up.
Here are some more power phrases and questions to use as mantras or family motto’s when talking about patience!
Comment your thoughts or phrases that you like to use!
PATIENCE POWER PHRASES & QUESTIONS
Always be looking to motivate with something new and trade around what you use. These are some common and powerful ways to bring kids around in short chats.
PATIENCE DRILLS & END CLASS GAME:
GAME FOR PATIENCE PRACTICE – Actually not a game, but you can turn it in to one! Ask nicely for the child to hold a position and wait for extended period without moving before taking action. This works great when playing games, add a rule to have to hold still for x time to make your next move ect..
PATIENCE POWER PHRASES:
I CAN WAIT
I WILL ACCEPT OTHERS, FOR WHO THEY ARE
I WILL RAISE MY HAND, AND WAIT UNTIL ITS MY TURN TO SPEAK
I CAN WAIT
THE BEST THINGS, TAKE TIME
I WILL LISTEN, BEFORE I SPEAK
I PROMISE, TO LET OTHERS, HAVE THEIR TURN
PATIENCE POWER QUESTIONS:
What does patience mean? TO WAIT SIR (can use to accept)
Is your turn more important than someone elses? NO SIR
Does talking over people who are talking show patience? NO SIR
Does getting mad or upset because you want your turn NOW show patience? NO SIR
Does jiggling around and whining make it go faster? NO SIR
Does raising our hand and waiting for our turn show patience? YES SIR
Is patience important to a black belt? YES SIR
Written by: Cory Rose
Peaceful Warriors Martial Arts